P: You mentioned earlier that not every relationship is pertinent to my awakening.
MQ: Isn’t that a relief?
P: Yes. But, how can I tell which ones are and which ones are not.
MQ: Those interactions that are pertinent to desire to create the conditions for awakening are called relevant relationships. For the sake of our conversation a relevant relationship is defined as one in which you spend more than forty-eight hours per year in direct, conscious interactions.
P: Is the formula of forty-eight hours per year arbitrary? You must forgive me for saying this, but that number sounds a little cut and dried. Can you tell me how you came to this definition?
MQ: This amount of time is not arbitrary. It is based on my studies of awakened people and awakened teachers and the ways in which they conduct themselves in relationships with people who clearly have no desire to uproot concealed conditioning. Without contradicting or confining their own genuine aspirations, this amount of time allows an awakened person to continue to have relationships with special people who have absolutely no interest in awakening. In this way, karmic relationships, such as those with family members who have no interest in awakening, are not denied.
EVOLUTIONARY POINTER: Running away from personal conflict is not an aspect of awakening, but neither is dealing with it just because you don’t want to bruise the other person’s self-image. The key is finding a ground that is marginally beneficial to truth in these complex situations.
P: So the bottom-line is that if mom wants to remain attached to the ego-mind, that’s fine?
MQ: Perfectly fine.
P: That’s great to know.
MQ: Please understand; my goal is to help you clearly distinguish your relevant relationships from those that have little or no impact on your quest to express your full potential. And in a further explanation, please note that conscious interactions do not include time you spend sleeping under the same roof with other people.
EVOLUTIONARY POINTER: The time spent in the unconscious presence of another person is not even relevant to that particular relationship, let alone to your awakening - not unless you and your partner are cocreating realities by lucid dreaming while asleep at night!
MQ: When you aspire to live in authenticity, you will find that with clarity of awareness, even the most challenging interactions can be adjusted so that they are no longer hindering your desire.
P: So, I can appease the conditioned mind in certain relationships, but in a way that has no affect whatsoever on my quest to realize and express my inherent capacity for greatness?
MQ: Yes, absolutely.
( © - "The Uncommon Path" by Irish author Mick Quinn.)
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