P: So passing interactions with my mail delivery person or the drycleaner are not relevant to my awakening, assuming, of course, that I am appropriately pleasant and courteous.
MQ: This is true. For instance, you cannot have an awakened relationship with the guy who works at the coffee shop, whom you see every morning for sixty seconds. This is simply because this small amount of relatedness cannot deliver an outcome beyond pleasantries and a nice latte. Nonetheless, such relationships always have the potential of relevance.
EVOLUTIONARY POINTER: For a relationship to be relevant to your awakening, it must also hold the potential to blossom into an awakened relationship.
P: Awakened relationships can only emerge from those that are currently relevant?
MQ: In general, yes. Of course, it is not out of the question that you could meet a new person with whom you can immediately create a relationship whose basis is beyond the unhealthy-ego. But, it is only with extended periods of time spent in conscious relatedness with this person that you can see the true depth of their perspectives and understanding. Because the basis for this relationship is more advanced than ego-bonding, a little more effort is usually required, especially when starting out in a relationships. This is a topic for my next book.
P: Okay. I see now why I must separate my relationships into those that are relevant and those that are not, because the ego-mind likes to jumble all of them together in one big heap.
MQ: Exactly! Because, that’s what it’s always done. And if you can’t tell which relationships are relevant to your awakening and which ones are not, the ego-mind is always going to be able to hide in that unknowingness.
EVOLUTIONARY POINTER: You can only engage consciously when you are clear that your intentions for interacting are not completely embedded in individual and collective conditioning.
P: So, if I am not certain about the basis for a particular relationship, then it is likely the insidious part of the ego is certain.
MQ: Yes. And the implication of this unconscious separation eventually leads to conflict.
P: But the ego-mind likes to have me think that every interaction I have is important.
MQ: Every interaction is important, but that’s not really the point. Awakening and being perceived as a nice person are two completely different matters.
EVOLUTIONARY POINTER: It is only by bringing the clarity of your purest intentions to all of your relevant relationships that together we can forge toward the evolution of consciousness and culture.
P: So, the point is: to awaken all of your relevant interactions. This is very different, and certainly more challenging, than being nice to the checkout person or the people at the yoga center. Having a goal of expressing myself beyond attachment to ego-mind in all of my relevant relationships is an ultimate call to responsibility.
MQ: That’s it!
P: What about group interactions?
MQ: Group relationships, such as: playing in an orchestra, singing in a choir, a relationship with a spiritual group or as a student of a other kinds of learning, can all be relevant to your awakening. If you are spending more than four hours every month; eight hours, six times per year; or about one hour per week in direct, fully focused, interpersonal exchanges in such situations then you need to consider the relevance of these relationships on your awakening. The key of course is not to distance yourself from such activities, but to bring your awareness to the possible presence of concealed conditioning in your interactions.
P: And what about adventure sports?
MQ: Extreme sports and other adrenaline-charged activities are frequently a response to a lack of meaning and purpose in other areas of your life; therefore, relevant relationships based in such activities are useful only if you want to be physically hurt, or you are addicted to peak experiences.
P: So there is nothing wrong with bungee jumping off a bridge once in a while?
MQ: Not in the least, but if your life is completely consumed with climbing the next great rock face in the Pyrenees, it is safe to say that the dark side of the ego has got you handcuffed to a high that is detrimental not only to your immune system, but to your awakening as well.
P: Then it’s okay to have fun with my friends in social settings that I know are based entirely on the ego?
MQ: Yes, of course. Everyone’s life situations are different. Remember the distinction between relevant versus irrelevant relationships and you’ll do just fine.
P: So, to stay in a relevant relationship in which the other person is unwilling or unable to let go of unneeded suffering is to include myself as part of the cause of their unnecessary anguish?
EVOLUTIONARY POINTER: Awakened compassion is to figure out a way to show someone that they are much more than just the conditioned fears and desires of the culturally-created-self.
MQ: Yes. You can always allow for an exception, but then you will have to choose conditioning over awakening, suffering over resolution, and mediocrity over potential. Why might you do that?
P: Because I want to put compromise ahead of evolution in that particular interaction?
MQ: Yes. The unhealthy-ego would like that karma, but I am sure you don’t. Do you?
( © - "The Uncommon Path" by Irish author Mick Quinn.)
Our Amzon sponsor link
is.gd/YlIR 
